CLEO helps you

Adapted from askCLEO. LOL

I know there’s nothing wrong with being single, and for a while I was quite content to be one of those swinging singles, doing my own thing without having to ‘report’ to anyone. But now I’m starting to feel a little down about it. I’ve been trying to get back into the dating scene the past few months, but I’m still single. What’s wrong with me?

A lot of people are single through choice, while some are single because of situation (like working or living in a place where there are very few other single people). And of course, there are those who’d love to be in a relationship and meet lots of available people but still remain solo.

There are two types of relationships – ‘co-creational’, where two balanced people live their lives side by side; and ‘needy’ relationships, where one or both partners are using each other to compensate for low self-esteem. If you’re had co-creational relationships in the past, being single probably doesn’t frighten you. Needy people, meanwhile, want someone to do all the things they should be doing for themselves – someone to entertain, financially support and nurture them. Not surprisingly, this sort of person sweats desperation and any self-respecting prospect runs like hell on sight. If this is you, try dating yourself. Treat yourself the way an adoring partner would: spoil, pamper, and motivate yourself just as they would. Just when you decide you don’t need a man, you’ll be flooded with offers.

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