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RIP XM

It’s official.

My previous company, where I stayed for 6 months before I left for further studies in 2003, and 6 years as my first job after graduation in 2007, has been merged with many other agencies worldwide to form a new agency.

I remember being excited when an ex-colleague from iT21 sent me a jobstreet link about an opening at XM Asia Pacific Pte Ltd. Back in 2003, after 2 years being a multimedia programmer, I wanted to move on to doing something related to the internet. Something which I was very interested in as it was an IN thing and I had a Diploma in Internet Computing. So when this job opening came about, I hopped on. After 2 rounds of interview, I finally fulfilled one of my dreams of working in the advertising industry – as a webmaster.

It was a short stint, as I decided to go for further studies (which was in my plan after graduating with a diploma in 2001) when NTU offered me a place. Even as an undergrad, I often went back to do freelance. You can imagine how passionate I was about the internet. And how I love that place – the environment, the culture. Sadly, when school workload increased (plus I had many other commitments), I stopped working freelance for them (partly also because the person I usually liaised with left the company).

Because I had such great memories at XM, I connected with my ex-supervisor few days before my final exams. So I rejoined XM as an Associate Consultant (Technology Solutions).

At the blink of the eye, I spent 5.5 years in XM – including a short 9 months stay at Hong Kong working on an overseas project.

Bittersweet memories I have of XM. Though I was worn out (as early as a few months into the job), I stayed on due to the passion towards it. I love the place. I love the colleagues.

Yesterday, it was officially announced that XM will be merged with many other agencies to form a new network.

Even though I’ve left for 2 years (decided to move on to pursue my other dream of working in the education industry), I still feel connected to XM in a way or another. It’s like once you’re a student of a school and takes part in many activities, you become attached to it. Though I have my grouses about this place, I’m still proud to have been a part of it.

RIP XM. You will be greatly missed. No matter what, you have a special place in my heart.

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Who will be there

Logged in to the blog, hoping to get some inspiration and write something.

At the corner of the admin page, lie the many drafts that have left forgotten. Neglected.

And this caught my eye.

因为你的出现，我的生活有了小小的转泪点。

It was dated all the way back to 2013 September.

And I wondered why that line went unpublished.

I can’t remember why, but I can deduce why.

  • Some topics are within a stay-away zone, regardless within the blog or in real-life conversations.
  • I was (still is) concerned about how people see me as.
  • There was no inspiration to continue after writing that line.

All three are valid points, and possibly it was due to these factors combined.

For someone who thinks that she has always been doing the right thing (well, all humans do, don’t we?), it takes a lot of courage to face the negative side of ourselves. When people surrounding her points out the issues that she has been refusing to acknowledge, she tends to stay away from the topic. No one likes to admit they are wrong anyway.

For someone who likes to portray a good image to other people, sometimes it takes a while to decide if the boundary should be stepped on.

Some topics, though mentioned, were pretty cryptic in some of the blog posts. No I’m not trying to hide anything. I’m fighting very hard to resist the urge to share my thoughts, my feelings. It’s like having a secret that I want to share, but can’t because it’s supposed to be a secret. (Possibly why I have another blog locked up for such topics.)

And I’m keeping mum not because they are anything confidential. Because I don’t think anyone would be interested to know.

Or possibly because I’m embarrassed to share them.

But I guess as you grow older, the tolerance level of embarrassment goes up. Or simply 看开了.

Though sometimes I wonder, who would really be interested to know your inner thoughts? Who would be interested to know why a particular decision was made?

Possibly no one, except the one who is interested in you, as a whole.

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2014 Reflections

It’s the time of the year where people will start posting on their reflections 2014 and/or resolutions for 2015.

Being an irregular blogger over these 2 years, I can’t remember if I did anything similar in 2013. Goes to show how irregular I’ve been blogging! (edit: I found a Goodbye 2013 post!)

Looking back, 2014 was eventful. Earlier this year, I wished for the ability to continue flipping the book. Though I didn’t get the opportunity to continue flipping, things were good while it lasted. 🙂

Earlier in the year, I started classes on classical guitar. Music has always been a passion. Guitar wasn’t the first instrument I wanted to learn (piano is!), it is an instrument that I think is easier to bring around when the occasion rises. 10 months now and I’m getting ready to take Grade 3 LCM Practical exam in April 2015! Prepared to fail but I’ll still try my best.

2014 was also a year of a few trips. As Jiawen was on an exchange at Bath (a 2 hours bus ride from London) in the first half of the year, 2 cousins (Jiayun & Wanxin) decided to make a trip to UK/Europe before Jiawen comes back in July (the main agenda of the trip was to help Jiawen bring her stuff back). Itinerary for this trip included London / Bath, Germany (Berlin / Munich) and Switzerland (Zurich / Lucerne / Jungfrau). We purposely included Germany because Leemei (another cousin of ours) is living in Berlin and we’ve not seen her since CNY! And I thought we can save a bit on accommodation if we bunk in at her place. hehehe 😛

I’ve yet sorted out the photos (procrastination wins), but the browsing of the photos is enough to make me want to go back again! Goal for 2016 perhaps?

That was the highlight of the year which happened in end May / June.

And in July, I was overseas again! Went to Malacca with J-Kai & his sister. This time round (I went Malacca with J-Kai & Jem in 2013 too), we covered new places that included the Peranakan Museum and popular eateries that were strongly recommended.

Sometime in August, there was a decision made to take on a 3-year gym membership with True Fitness. Few weeks later, I made the swop to become their lifetime member. To-date, I have been going for their classes regularly (grateful for the companion of my zumba khaki!). No regrets so far!

November was where I went Langkawi for the first time. It was also the first time I went overseas with my parents and the extended family via plane! Knowing how much I love kids, this trip allowed me to have some bonding with the 3 year old nephew and 7 month old niece.

It was also a month where I bought my own bowling ball. Thanks to peer influence of the colleagues.

In Dec, I went on to take up the (self-issued) challenge of running 10km at Standard Chartered Marathon Singapore. Despite not having done any training since the registration in Aug (I think), I still managed to clock 1:33:56 (compared to the last run in 2012 – which was also my first attempt – at 1:35:xx). Slight improvement in timing and I felt less lethargic after the run compared to 2 years ago. I guess the regular zumba classes helped!

As I did some searching on blog posts on resolutions for the past years, the one posted in 2013 for the summary of 2011/2012 sounded very sad. As I read the summary, I felt sorry for myself for not making the right decision earlier. The me now is definitely much healthier and happier! Whatever that had been killed in 2011/2012 are all coming back – photography, blogging (still not regular but at least better?). I love my current life! 🙂

Resolutions

I vaguely remembered I wanted to have some resolutions this time last year, but I think I didn’t jot it down because I knew that I wasn’t going to fulfil it/them. When I read that post in 2013, I realised that the resolutions listed there weren’t fulfilled (yes NONE at all!). So this year, I thought I’ll put some wants / wishes that I hope I can fulfil this year. Note the keyword – HOPE.

First on the list will be the driving license. It has been on my list since university days. I think I want to strike it off the list while I still can.

I also wish to have a highlight trip of the year. The HKG trip in Jan has been confirmed. Tentative plan for other trips are Penang in March, Bandung in June, New Zealand in Dec.

I don’t think I will have time for my language classes this year, especially if I want to continue with my guitar classes. But if time permits, I would like to resume either Japanese or Korean class. I can’t decide which one I prefer. Or I might want to pick up a new language. German perhaps?

Overall, 2014 was good. It was definitely better than 2010 – 2012 combined. I’m hoping 2015 will be awesomer!